me and bae having sex

  • bae: mmm yeah fuck me baby
  • me: put a quarter in the swear jar

androgynistic:

never forget that your thighs are wonderful

(via nymphetangel)

fatted:

Family: *says something racist*
Family: *says something sexist*
Family: *says something homophobic*
Family: *makes fun of people with tattoos*
Family: *tells you why you’re bad at life*
Family: why don’t you wanna spend time with us?

(via a-clockwork-pink)

bakrua:

*runs after garbage truck* WAIT!!!!! YOU FORGOT ME!!!!!

(via lettersfromno-one)

edgebug:

instead of watching the 50 Shades trailer, why not just make awkward eye contact with a total stranger at the grocery store for a solid 2 minutes and 34 seconds? you get the same skin-crawling, uncomfortable feeling but without the shitty writing, terrible acting and massive dose of rape culture

(via thefuuuucomics)